Why did the chicken cross the road ?


Statements

Mr. T:
American actor (born Laurence Tureaud in 1952) known for his role as Baracus in the A-Team television series

If you saw me coming you'd cross the road too !
BOB DYLAN :
American singer and songwriter, born Robert Zimmerman on May 24, 1941.
How many roads must one chicken cross ?
MARTIN LUTHER KING Jr :
Civil rights leader (January 15, 1929 - April 4, 1968)
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
VICE PRESIDENT GORE :
Vice President under President Bill Clinton and environmentalist campaigner.
If we do not act now, more and more chickens will be crossing roads. Failing to recognise that chickens cross roads every day and to act upon it will seal the fate of the planet for the future generations.
COLONEL OLIVER NORTH :
Born October 7, 1943 and known for his part in the Iran-contras scandal during the Ronald Reagan presidency.
If I answered that, National Security would be at stake.
FOX MULDER :
Fictional character in the X Files TV series.
It was a government conspiracy : You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it ?
PRESIDENT CLINTON :
President from 1993 to 2001.
I did not, and I repeat, I did not have any relations with that chicken.
OLIVER STONE :
Film director (born September 15, 1946).
The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing the road ?"
DARTH VADER :
Fictional character from Star Wars movies.
Because it was attracted by the power of the Dark Side.
NEIL ARMSTRONG :
Astronaut.
One small step for the chicken anyway...
RALPH NADER :
Environmentalist (born February 27, 1934) and consumers' rights leader.
The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
RONALD REAGAN :
President from 1981 to 1989.
I say give the road to the chickens and let them decide. The government needs to let go of strangling chickens so they cross roads.
GEORGE W. BUSH :
American president (2001-2009)
It looks to me that the chicken crossed the road when it left one side on its way to the other.
VICE PRESIDENT CHENEY :
Vice president under President Bush and secretary of defense under President GeorgeW. Bush
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.
JACK NICHOLSON :
American actor, born April 22, 1937.
The (censored) chicken crossed the (censored) road because it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored) reason.
JOHNNY CASH :
Singer and songwriter (February 26, 1932 - September 12, 2003).
In my days, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
COLONEL SANDER :
Founder of the Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurants (September 9, 1890 December 16, 1980).
I missed one ?
L.A.P.D. :
Give us ten minutes alone with the chicken and we'll find out.